Mark, I'd end up on Tosh.o, "We flew vibrator tomato guy to Hollywood for this week's web redemption."
My girlfriend used to live in Alabama, where sex toys are illegal:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anti-Ob...nforcement_Act
So I should add the disclaimer that if you live in the state of Alabama and attempt to pollinate your tomatoes this way, you could end up violating state obscenity laws.
I'm already starting to see a lot more tiny green tomatoes instead of dropped blossoms, so I think it's working. I haven't told anyone yet in person, just tomatoville. You people are the only ones who would understand.